The root of Carrie-Anne's problems was the sexual abuse she suffered as a child at the hands of her father.

Suzanne didn't know anything about the abuse until the day Carrie-Anne left home. Carrie-Anne had a fight with her mother over staying out late and, according to Mrs. Rath, 'Acting like a tramp!' Mrs. Rath grabbed her by the arm and told her that as long as she was living with in her house she had to live by her rules, and if she didn't like it, she could get out.

That was enough for Carrie-Anne. Suzanne followed her sister into the bedroom and found her on the floor packing to leave. She tried to calm her down but Carrie-Anne was furious, jamming her clothes into a duffel bag and throwing stuff her parents had bought her across the room. Suzanne told her to at least wait until Dad got home so everyone could sit down and talk it out.

At the word 'Dad' Carrie-Anne stopped what she was doing and stared at Suzanne, her face changing from anger to sadness. 'Oh God!' she said, her voice cracking. She stumbled to her feet and hugged Suzanne, harder than she'd ever hugged her before.'Carrie-Anne,' sobbed Suzanne, 'Please don't go.' The words were like a lock snapping on a flood-gate and Carrie-Anne's eyes brimmed with tears. 'Suzanne,' she said. She held her younger sister so tight Suzanne thought she would burst, but she didn't mind, she didn't care. At that moment, Suzanne was ready to lose herself instead of her older sister.

Finally Carrie-Anne pulled back and wiped her face. 'Don't worry, Suzanne,' she said. Her face was different now, bright with conviction and hard, like the crystals on the little altar in Suzanne's bedroom. 'I'm going to take care of everything,' she said. She reached down and threw the duffel bag over her shoulder, then took Suzanne by the hand. 'Come on,' she said, leading her sister out of her bedroom and into the living room.

Mrs. Rath was sitting in an armchair, talking on the phone. When she saw the duffel bag, she said into the phone, 'Sheila, I'll call you right back.' She put down the phone and glared at Carrie-Anne. 'Where do you think you're going?' she snapped.

'I'm leaving, Mom,' said Carrie-Anne, her voice hard. Mrs. Rath asked her where the hell she thought she was going, she couldn't take care of herself, unpack that bag, you're not going anywhere. Suzanne stood by silently, waiting for a chance to break in and make things right between them. Carrie-Anne adjusted the bag on her shoulder and squeezed Suzanne's hand. 'I'm going,' she said. 'But before I go, I want you to know what Dad's been doing.'

Mrs. Rath's face darkened. 'What about your father?'

'Dad's been doing stuff with me,' said Carrie-Anne. Mrs. Rath stared at her in disbelief. 'What are you saying?'

'I'm saying,' said Carrie-Anne, 'That he's been having sex with me. Intercourse. And other stuff.'

Mrs. Rath flew out of the chair, her hands twisted into claws. 'You lying little slut!' she hissed, slashing at Carrie-Anne's face. Carrie-Anne stepped out of the way and grabbed her hands, forcing them away from her face. Without knowing what she was doing, Suzanne lunged forward and grabbed one of her mother's arms. 'I never told anyone,' said Carrie-Anne, 'Because he said if I did, he'd do it to Suzanne, too.'

'Get out!' screamed Mrs. Rath. 'Get out before I throw you out!'

'Oh, I'll get out,' said Carrie-Anne. She turned and looked at Suzanne, her face fierce. 'But if I ever hear from Suzanne that he even fucking looked at her wrong, I'll be back.' She turned back to my mother. 'And I'll kill him.'

Stunned silence. Mrs. Rath stared at Carrie-Anne's face, absorbing what she'd said. Something passed across Mrs. Rath's face, and in that instant Suzanne knew that her mother knew Carrie-Anne spoke the truth. About the abuse. What's more, she knew, like a flaming message in the sky, that Carrie-Anne meant what she'd said. About killing her father. If he ever touched Suzanne.

Childhood sexual abuse. How do you define it? What are the numbers of abused children, past and present? What problems do they have as a result of their abuse? Perhaps you, like Carrie-Anne, are or have been a victim of childhood sexual abuse. Or maybe you're a perpetrator trying to understand what you're doing, looking for a way out. Whoever you are, whatever you want, this folder contains information, resources and discussion boards that we hope will be helpful to you.

Rape Abuse & Incest National Network (RAINN) RAINN is the nation's largest anti-sexual assault organization. They operate the National Sexual Assault Hotline at 1.800.656.HOPE Making Daughters Safe Again MDSA is an organization specializing in mother-daughter sexual abuse. They also provide online group experiences for survivors. The Family Violence and Sexual Assault Institute Improving the quality of life for individuals by providing information and training that promote violence free living. Note - Don't see what your looking for? Send it to paul@bloodandrosesfilm.com and we'll list it as time permits. Thanks!

When someone asks us, 'What kind of film is Blood and Roses?', our answer is, 'A women's film.' To us (and granted, this is just our opinion), a "women's film" is a story that deals with important or specific female issues. We're proud to call ourselves feminists, people who believe in the fair and equal treatment of women, both personally and socially. Regardless of whether you call yourself a feminist or not, we hope you will find the following links helpful.

Women's Organizations NOW - National Organization for Women One of the most well known women's empowerment organizations in the United States. The National Council of Women's Organizations A non-partisan network of more than 100 women's organizations. Issues include affirmative action, social security, and women's health. The Feminist Majority Foundation Organization dedicated to equality for women. Website has numerous links to various worldwide causes all centering around women's rights. Links for Ms. Magazine and online store where 'feminist' merchandise can be purchased. Women's Television/Radio Networks and Programs Lifetime - Television for Women Cable channel features original movies and television dramas along with re-runs of syndicated hit shows including: The Golden Girls, The Nanny and Designing Women. Oxygen Network Cable channel features syndicated shows like Absolutely Fabulous and original programming like Girls Behaving Badly. Oxygen also features Oprah After the Show and replays of The Ellen DeGeneres Show. The Ellen DeGeneres Show Daytime talk show featuring stand-up comic Ellen DeGeneres. Most guests are celebrities, but she has been very popular among women viewers. The Oprah Winfrey Show The Queen of Daytime talk, what else is there to say? Creative Folk.com An internet resource page listing numerous radio programs focused on women and feminist issues. One of the more popular sites on this listing is Amazon Radio http://www.amazonradio.com/index.html, which is home of the National Women's Radio Archive. Women's International News Gathering Service - WINGS An independent radio production company that produces and distributes news programs by women about women around the world. Women's Radio 'Real Talk for Wise Women' -Site is a myriad of information including news and politics and women's organizations. Note - Don't see what your looking for? Send it to paul@bloodandrosesfilm.com and we'll list it as time permits. Thanks!

When Suzanne was 10 years old, one of the neighbors asked her if she could babysit their two year old son, Jeremy, while they were gone for the week-end. Suzanne said sure, but when she asked her mother about it she said no, she was too little, she had to bring Carrie-Anne.

Unfortunately, Carrie-Anne had something else planned for that day, so she wasn't exactly thrilled with the idea. But Mrs. Rath insisted, so that was that. The sisters walked to the neighbor's house, Carrie-Anne never missing a moment to let Suzanne know how unhappy she was. Finally, exasperated, Suzanne turned to her and snapped, 'Why do you have to be so moody all the time? Why can't you just be nice for once?' Carrie-Anne's eyes darkened. 'I'll show you fucking nice.'

'And don't use the f word,' said Suzanne, feeling smugly self-righteous until Carrie-Anne punched her hard in the arm. Suzanne yelled and told her if she didn't knock it off she'd tell Dad. Carrie-Anne got quiet then, but Suzanne could feel Carrie-Anne's eyes burning a hole in her back.

A few hours after the neighbors left, Carrie-Anne got up from the couch where she and Suzanne were watching T.V and said, 'Come on, I'm gonna check on Jeremy.' Suzanne put down her astrology book and followed Carrie-Anne into the bedroom to where Jeremy lay peacefully sleeping in his crib. Carrie-Anne walked over to the crib and looked down. 'He looks so peaceful,' she said. She looked up at Suzanne and shrugged. 'Be a shame if someone woke him up.'

Suzanne glared at her. 'Carrie-Anne, no!'

'Don't worry, Mother Mary, I won't wake him.' Carrie-Anne turned back to the baby and gently stroked his hair. 'I mean, if I was going wake him - ' She looked up, an innocent look on her face - 'I'd do this.' She tapped Jeremy lightly on top of his head. Suzanne told her to stop, and Carrie-Anne smiled back at her. 'Stop, stop, stop, you sound like a Hollies' song,' she said. Suzanne giggled. 'Come on, leave him alone.'

Carrie-Anne smiled atherme. 'You mean like that song Leave Me, by ... ' She reached into the crib and tapped Jeremy on the head again. 'The Hollies?' Suzanne started to giggle as Jeremy stirred. 'Be nice!' she told her sister, forcing back the giggles. Carrie-Anne shrugged. 'Be nice! Be nice! Well what about this, is this nice enough for you?' And before Suzanne could say anything, she slapped Jeremy hard across the face.

He came to life with a confused wail. Suzanne put her hand to her mouth, horrified but at the same time excited. 'Your not being very nice!' teased Carrie-Anne, wagging her finger at the baby. She looked back at Suzanne. 'What do you think?'

'Carrie-Anne,' her sister giggled nervously, 'Stop!' Carrie-Anne nodded her head. 'OK, I'll stop,' she said. 'After I do this.' She reached into the crib and slapped Jeremy. Hard. Across the face. He screamed and she slapped him again. And again. And again.

Suzanne was frozen. Her rage was like an atom bomb explosion, unimaginable but, at the same time, horribly fascinating. Finally, Suzanne came to her senses and grabbed her sister. 'Carrie-Anne!' she yelled, grabbing her arm. Carrie-Anne wrenched around and glared at her, her eyes bright. 'Get your fucking hands off me!' she hissed. Her eyes were like burning coals.

Suzanne yanked her away from the crib. 'No! Carrie-Anne! Stop!' Carrie-Anne broke her hold and turned back to the crib, so Suzanne grabbed her again. 'Carrie-Anne!' This time Suzanne screamed, and this time Carrie-Anne heard her and stopped. Suzanne put her arm around her sister and she was breathing hard, as if she'd just run a race. 'It's OK,' Suzanne told her, although she knew it wasn't.

Anger is a normal, mostly healthy human emotion. But when it turns destructive, it can lead to problems: At work, in relationships, and in the overall quality of your life. Like Carrie-Anne, you may find yourself in the grip of an unpredictable and powerful emotion. This folder deals with anger management and offers, we hope, a way to help you understand and control anger.

Correctional Service of Canada: Studies of Female Aggression and Violence Case study provided by the Canadian Correctional Service discussing violence by women in three main categories; violence in the home, offense based studies and institutional studies. Mental Help Net - Anger and Aggression (psychological self-help) Web page that discusses the signs of anger and aggression, how and why it develops, and preventative measures to control it. Teen Paths The mission of this website is to help families deal with troubled teens. Topics deal with self-esteem issues, anger issues, sexual issues and self-mutilation. Offers schooling for children in need of help. Note - Don't see what your looking for? Send it to paul@bloodandrosesfilm.com and we'll list it as time permits. Thanks!

To tell the truth, we're not sure what this term means anymore. Patty Jenkin's superb film 'Monster' tells the story of Aileen Carol Wuornos, a prostitute who was executed for killing seven men in Florida in the 1980s. Promotional material for the film claimed, "America's first female serial killer!" But the film itself shows Wuornos killing for profit, not the serial killer's traditional motives of lust, power and control. Was Wuornos a true serial killer, or a mass murderer? The information in this folder explores these issues and others, including links to books, movies and other media about serial killers.

Federal Bureau of Investigation FBI Behavioral Science Unit Comprehensive website containing all of the FBI's functions including information on criminal psychology and clinical forensic psychology. Serial Killers Comprehensive website containing discussion forums, email discussion groups and resources all pertaining to the world of serial killers and heinous crimes. Serial Killer Info This page is currently under construction but will feature information on criminal profiling, forensics and various serial killers. Crime Magazine - An Encyclopedia of Crime This link contains information on recent books that have come out about serial killers including books about Richard Ramirez and Richard Speck. Supernaught.com A website for serial killer memorabilia. Items include Gacy oil paintings, Manson paintings, videos and dvd's. MULTIMEDIA Mind of a Killer - An Investigation of Serial Homicide (CD-ROM) A multimedia investigation into the world of serial homicide. CD-ROM includes video footage of the world's most notorious mass murders. Site also contains information defining what makes a serial killer and includes a 'case of the day'. Note - Don't see what your looking for? Send it to paul@bloodandrosesfilm.com and we'll list it as time permits. Thanks!

Say "no" to drugs? Well, which ones? That cup of English Breakfast tea you had for breakfast the other day contained caffeine, an addictive drug that stimulates the central nervous system, cardiac muscle, and respiratory system. In short it delays fatigue, just like the street drug speed or any other amphetamine. The fact that it's legal or socially acceptable doesn't alter what it is or what it does...

A critical moment in the film is when Suzanne reveals to her sister that she took ecstasy (and subsequently broke her agreement with Carrie-Anne by calling their father). Ecstasy and a drugs such as LSD and marijuana are known as psychotropics, which means they act on the mind. Suzanne would say that psychotropic drugs care like tools: You can use them wisely or carelessly. Although it's not addressed in the film, she uses psychotropics to better understand herself and the world at large, both spiritually and psychologically. For that reason, this section contains helpful and intelligent information on ecstasy and other psychotropic drugs.

ecstasy.org Purpose of the site is to give accurate and objective information about MDMA. Site includes links to various articles and books written about the drug along with web links to sites that include information sites, legislation sites, organizations, discussion groups, and publications dedicated to the MDMA culture. Also includes information on a number of books written by Nicholas Saunders. CLICK HERE Some of these publications are not available in all countries. Center for Cognitive Liberty and Ethics - Ask Dr. Shulgin online Dr. Shulgin's website sponsored by CCLE where one can ask questions, read the Q&A section or purchase one of his books. Note - Don't see what your looking for? Send it to paul@bloodandrosesfilm.com and we'll list it as time permits. Thanks!

This folder contains links and other information related to spirituality, or what we like to call "matters of the soul". Here you'll find some of the things we've explored on my spiritual path, a list that includes religion, philosophy and mythology. As a friend of ours likes to say, 'Your mileage may vary,' another way of saying your spiritual path is exactly that: Yours! With that in mind, I hope you'll enjoy and benefit from what's here.

Catholicism Catholic Online The official website of the Catholic Church. Information ranging from Catholic news organizations, information regarding Catholic rituals and sacraments, online service for Catholic singles and much more. Catholic Online Forum Forum topics include prayers and petitions, Mary the mother of God, Doctrine and Cannon Law, Marriage and Family, sacred scripture and saints. BeliefNet Discussion Forum - Catholicism A variety of discussion groups about Catholicism. Some topics include: women in Catholicism and Catholicism debate. Catholic.net Information pertaining to the Catholic religion including 'breaking news' on topics such as abortion, abstinence and the new Mel Gibson film The Passion of the Christ. The site also contains links to books and magazines about Catholicism as well as information regarding various church documents. Catholic Internet Library on the Ordination of Women in the Catholic Chruch A website dedicated to the belief that the discussion about women joining the priesthood should be left open. The Forgiveness Web -The Internet's Most Comprehensive Forgiveness Resource Everything you would want to find out about forgiveness is on this website including links to books (provided by Amazon), message boards and websites. Ontario Consultants on Religious Tolerance A website promoting religious understanding and tolerance. Information on this website includes various religious beliefs, cults, religious laws, and 'hot topics'. BeliefNet Information on religions and spirituality. Information on topics such as meditation, astrology, morality, culture, health and healing, relationships and charity. Buddhism BuddhaNet The original worldwide Buddhist information and education network. DharmaNet International Information on Buddhist study and practice resources. Fundamental Buddhism Explantion of Buddhism based on the Pali Canon. Tibetan Buddhism Information on the government of Tibet in exile. Digital International Buddhism Organization Directory service providing information on Buddhism resources. BeliefNet Discussion Forums -Buddhism A variety of discussion groups about Buddhism. Topics include: Living Dharma and Zen Buddhism. Green Tara Green Tara - Mother of all Buddhas Information includes description of the Green Tara as well as additional links on Buddhism. Green Tara and White Tara - Feminist Ideals in Buddhist Art Article about the origins of Goddess Tara. Himalayan Art - Tara Green Description of the Buddhist Goddess. SacredSource Website that sells over 500 multicultural Goddesses statues and sacred images including Green Tara. Samurai Samurai Archives A Japanese history page featuring information about famous Samurai, Samurai culture, Samurai history forum and additional links about Samurai. Superior Martial Arts Supplies Website that sells Samurai swords and other items related to the world of martial arts. Japanese Guide on Samuari Website from Japan with information relating to the history of Samuari. Note - Don't see what your looking for? Send it to paul@bloodandrosesfilm.com and we'll list it as time permits. Thanks!

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